Do you have trouble believing in yourself?
You are not alone.
It's pretty common.
Believing in yourself is having faith in your own abilities and what you are capable of.
Believing in yourself is about overcoming self-doubt and having the confidence to take action.
It's about not allowing self-limiting beliefs to hold you back from the success you are capable of achieving.
You owe it to yourself to start stamping out the self-limiting beliefs that you're dragging around…
…and to start genuinely believing in yourself.
Self-Limiting Beliefs Examples
Here's a small handful of extremely common limiting beliefs:
Common Limiting Beliefs About Yourself
- I am not good enough
- I am not clever enough / I don’t know enough
- Why would anyone listen to me, or care about what I have to say?
- I can’t be my true self or people will judge me
- I am not good-looking enough
- I am too old / too young
Common Limiting Beliefs About Money
- My family never had much money
- I've never been good with money
- I never have enough money, I'm always broke
- I will never make enough money
- Rich people are greedy
- Making a lot of money is impossible
Common Limiting Beliefs About Work/Business
- I don‘t have enough experience
- I don‘t have enough qualifications
- I don't have the right qualifications
- I am not good at sales/admin/with numbers…etc.
- I've left it too late to go after my dreams
- The economies not in good shape for starting a business
Overcoming Self-Limiting Beliefs
Identify Your Self-Limiting Beliefs
For many of us, our limiting beliefs are so deeply held that we barely even notice them any more.
We just allow them to invade our consciousness whenever something new, or challenging, or exciting, is put in front of us.
So start paying attention to them.
Start really switching on to your daily internal dialogue.
How much of it is positive, and how much is negative?
If you're struggling with your self-belief, there is a fair chance that a lot of what you're going to hear will be negative.
Pay very close attention to the thoughts that your mind throws at you when you are presented with some kind of opportunity.
What exactly is that powerful corner of your mind putting forward as reasons…
…as to why you should not pursue that particular opportunity?
Note them all down.
These are the limiting beliefs that are holding you back.
The one's that need to be replaced.
Identify Where Your Self-Limiting Beliefs Have Come From
Not always possible…well, not unless you want to go to an old-school Freudian psychologist every week for the next five years!
And few of us do.
And in fact, it's actually pretty easy to find the exact moment that a self-limiting believe was first dropped into your mind.
And it may have only happened the once…
…but because it occurred in a moment that was of high-importance to you, it had maximum impact.
“Your success depends mainly upon what you think of yourself and whether you believe in yourself.”William J.H. Boetcker
Other limiting beliefs may have embedded themselves in another way entirely.
These may have been drip-fed over a long period of time.
A prime example of a drip-fed limiting belief is when a parent repeatedly tells people that their child is shy, quiet, or even timid.
Funnily enough this is exactly how that child grows up thinking of themselves.
Find the source where possible, because it will make it easier to eliminate if you can.
How Valid Are These Self-Limiting Beliefs?
You're now going to take each of the self-limiting beliefs that you have found to be most limiting for you…
…and totally honestly asses whether they have any genuine foundation.
Some will, but most won't.
Start with your most limiting and destructive belief.
Is there firm evidence to support it? A genuine shortcoming to be addressed?
Or did it take-root from the false opinion of a friend, family member, work colleague, or you?
If you believe that it's based on fact…fine, that can be dealt with through some self-development in that particular area.
If it turns out to be based on conjecture…
…it's time to kick it into touch.
7 Powerful Ways To Develop Self Belief
1. Find Out Who You Really Are
Who are you…at your core?
You need to know.
True self-belief comes from understanding yourself, and being comfortable with yourself.
It comes from knowing about your core personality, like whether you're an introvert or an extrovert.
It comes from knowing what's important to you, as well as what isn't.
Which aspects of your job do you love, and which do you dread?
Whether you're a morning person, or a night owl.
Start really paying attention to all of this stuff.
Start noticing how you feel in different situations, and ask yourself why you're experiencing those particular feelings.
This will take a little time. But it should be interesting.
Be totally honest with yourself when you do this.
Of course you're going to discover some stuff that you don't necessarily like about yourself…
…we all do.
If you spend your life trying to fit in and be somebody you're not, you're unlikely to reach your full potential.
#2. Work on Your Strengths
Don't get caught in the common trap of constantly working on your weaknesses.
Mix it up.
But make absolutely certain that you spend plenty of time working on what you're already good at.
So that you become great in those areas.
Further developing your existing strengths will be energising for you.
Whereas spending too much time developing weaknesses can be energy-sapping.
Move most of your focus to your strengths, and you will immediately feel more confident.
The truth is that super-successful people hardly spend any of their time on what they're not good at.
Their success is largely rooted in their ability to know themselves, and to recognise their own strengths and weaknesses.
#3. Be Your Own Coach
You've kind of already started being your own coach.
First just by thinking about your own personal development.
And then by searching for, finding and reading this article.
If you've already taken action on any of the above steps…you're well ahead of the game.
Self-coaching is no more than viewing yourself as a work-in-progress, and taking regular, deliberate action to improve.
If you've either already acted on, or genuinely plan to act on, any of the steps already outlined in this article…
…then you have the self-confidence to recognise your core personality traits, your natural abilities, and weakness.
And that action shows that you’re comfortable in finding out about yourself.
And that shows that you're going to be great at self-coaching.
Find the best education, the best tools, to develop your talent.
Invest in yourself.
You don’t need anyone else to take through this process.
#4. Challenge Yourself Often
Whenever you develop a new skill, you feel more confident in yourself, which strengthens your self-belief.
But if you choose to stick with doing the same things you’ve always done, in the same way you've always done them…
…it’s pretty hard to see how anything might change for you in a meaningful way.
If what you did this week, looks very much like what you did last week, and the week before…
…which was the same thing you were doing last year, you’re maybe a little too comfortable.
It is time to start challenging yourself again.
Start edging out of that comfort-zone.
You don't have to bust out if it, just gently widen its sphere, and do it regularly.
Start participating in things you would not normally get involved in, both in and out of work.
Outside of your job, sign-up for something totally new that really interests and excites you.
And remember this:
Hardly anyone goes into the first day of a new challenge without some feelings of trepidation.
A new challenge is not something we generally feel that happy about when the time comes to start.
But once we've started, that's a different matter.
Hopefully you'll feel pretty happy that you've made a change that will move you forward again.
And the more you do it, the more your confidence will grow…
…and those feeling of trepidation just before getting started, will get less and less.
#5. Be Kind to Yourself
Stop beating yourself up whenever something doesn't go your way.
Or even when you totally mess up.
Few things destroy our self-believe as much as when we turn on ourselves following some kind of dissapointment.
And few things separate the average achievers from the massive over-achievers quite as much as the ability to halt the negative dialogue and quickly move on from set-backs.
We all mess up.
So go a little easier on yourself when it happens to you.
#6. Be Yourself
These days, many people just seem to want to assimilate.
To not stand out from the crowd in any way.
It's odd, because supposedly, we live in an age where uniqueness is celebrated.
And by trying to fit in, to not be who you really are, is a cast-iron guarantee of achieving averageness.
For some reason, things about ourselves that make us feel different, make us feel a little weird, often decrease our self-belief.
But actually, they are often the aspects of ourselves that can propel us forward.
Accepting yourself as you are, quirky stuff and all, will help you take a huge step towards believing in yourself.
#7. Affirmations / Mantras
I know, I know, ‘affirmations‘ sounds a little bit kookie and woo-woo.
But, well, they work for me, and hundreds of thousands of other people too.
And actually, it's not remotely kookie or woo-woo.
You're talking to yourself all of the time anyway.
Telling yourself you're good / not good at something.
Telling yourself you're too young / old to do something.
It is never ending.
So why not try repeating positive statements to yourself regularly?
Do it at the start of the day, and at the end of the day.
Before you know it, your positive daily affirmations will start becoming your minds internal dialogue.
Have You Enjoyed This Article?
Why not read some more from thedoublethink ‘Mindset' series?
Believing In Yourself – Wrapping It Up
We all have the ability to be the biggest obstacle to our own success.
And we all have the ability to be the greatest catalyst to our own success.
Why is it that one man can be reduced to a bag of nerves when speaking to room of maybe ten people…
…while Beyonce can sing live to a hundred thousand without the slightest sign of nerves?
Are they made of different stuff? They are not!
Their self-belief is the difference.
Nullifying self-limiting beliefs is a huge step on the road to your success and happiness.
Overcoming self-limiting beliefs takes work.
And it's something you will have to do repeatedly to keep them from popping up again, which is completely normal.
With every limiting belief you transform, your self-belief grows and you get stronger.
Work on these steps consistently, and you will start to feel that you are believing in yourself more and more.
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